Brian
That was a crazy party last night.
Ron
I had a dream I was making out with a muppet and I woke up to find I was licking the back of some girl's head.
Brian
I actually fell asleep on a girl's boob. Not as comfortable as you would think. Left a mark too.
Brian turns to Ron and points at his forehead. Brian has an impression shaped like a nipple.
Ron
Yikes.
Brian
Yeah.
Brian shaves the last spot on his face and then throws the razor in the garbage. Ron sees this and looks shocked.
Ron
What are you doing?
Brian
What?
Ron
Why'd you throw out your razor?
Brian
It's one of those new disposable ones.
Ron
Disposable razors?
Brian
Yeah, shave and throw it out. They're really cheap and also, there's some other shit.
Director (O.C.)
Cut! What was that?
The Director walks up to Ron and Brian.
Director
I need you guys to stick to the script. I don't know why the Bic company wants you two to do this but they do.
Ron
It's because we're real men. Good looking men.
Director
Just stick to the-
Ron
Men that built the Hoover Dam and make diamonds with their bare hands.
Director
Is he done?
Ron
Men that eat live animals and screw nameless women. Now I'm done.
Director
Ok-
Ron
Wait! Men that - Nope, I was done.
Director
Fantastic. Once again from "Why'd you throw out your razor?" Positions.
Ron and Brian go back the sinks.
Director (O.C.)
Action.
Ron
Why'd you throw out your razor?
Brian
It's one of those new disposable ones.
Ron
Disposable razors?
Brian
Yeah, shave and throw it out. They're cheap and I don't have to carry around that heavy, bulky old razor.
Ron
I, Ron Burgundy, would also like to use one.
Brian
They're available at most drug stores and retail establishments.
Ron
Hey, I live by a retail establishment.
Brian
They should have one.
Both
Disposable razors by Bic. Go shave yourself!
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