Idea #69

Ron has a date with the new secretary Madeline. She is 22 and very attractive. They are at dinner in a fancy restaurant. In front of each of them is a plate of Beef Wellington. She is not eating.

Ron

Madeline. That's an odd name.

Madeline

I was named after the children's book about the little girl in France.

Ron

What's it called?

Madeline

Madeline.

Ron

I've never heard of it. What's it about?

Madeline

(annoyed)

A little girl in France.

Ron

(not really paying attention anymore)

Fascinating.

(beat)

Are you enjoying your meal? They have the best Beef Wellington.

Madeline

Yeah. I don't eat this. I tried to tell you while you were ordering for me but you put your finger over my mouth from across the table.

Ron

You can do to put a few pounds on that frame.

Madeline

(takes deep breath)

What I'm saying is I don't eat meat.

Ron

(in a lower voice)

You can eat it. I won't tell any of your cult members.

Madeline

I'm going to order a salad.

Ron

I'll have them wrap that up so you can take it home. You know, eat it in private.

Madeline

I'm just going to go. This was a mistake. You're too old for me.

Ron

Too old for you? I'm 28!

Madeline

So that means you've been doing the news since you were 12?

Ron

I matured at a very early age. I had this mustache when I was 10. It was a glandular thing.

Madeline

Good night, Mr. Burgundy.

Madeline walks away.

Ron

You're not going to wait for your doggie bag!

(beat)

See you at work tomorrow!