Idea #36

Brian Fantana has a successful date with a young woman named Maddy. After some feeble attempts by Brian to get out of continuing the evening, they go back to her place. In the bedroom, Brian is clearly nervous but trying to act like his usual cool self.

Brian

So, what do you wanna do?

Maddy

You.

Brian

(nervous laughter)

And that's going to happen...all...night.

Maddy

(while kissing his neck)

Good. You can do whatever you want to me.

Brian

I'm going to...cover you in oil.

Maddy

(unbuttoning his shirt)

What kind of oil?

Brian

(getting into it)

Motor oil.

Maddy

Where are you gonna get that oil?

Brian

(in his sexiest voice)

At the gas station we passed driving over here.

Maddy

Do you like your girls slippery?

Brian

Slippery...mmmm....and flammable.

Maddy

(kissing his chest)

Are you going to set me on fire with passion?

Brian

Yes, I am. Get ready for a passion fire. Call the passion fire department.

Maddy

You're funny.

Brian

You're sexy.

Maddy

I like that. You know what else I like?

(unbuttons his pants)

What's down here.

Brian

(pulling away)

Whoa...well...he's flattered but...uhh...he...has to get up early in the morning.

Maddy

But he can get up now.

Brian

(laughs and puts shirt on)

Like an erection. You're clever. Listen, let's do this again soon.

Brian gets up and leaves a confused Maddy in her bedroom.

*Adam McKay has stated in the DVD commentary for the movie that Brian has never slept with a woman despite acting like a such a ladies man.